Break
by Makaria Lee
Summary: Ian was expecting them to forget; only they didn't and now it's turned into small, awkward birthday party.


Ian was completely expecting it to happen.

Even before Amy and Dan had come back for a brief period before heading off to the other side of the US, he knew no one would remember. They were all too worried about the hostages, quite frankly he was too. He almost didn't remember himself, but that Kansas girl – Elizabeth – sent him a text in the morning that reminded him. A day most people look forward to every year, among many others. A day celebrated by everyone around the world, but at different times.

Today was Ian's birthday.

He didn't really understand why people celebrated the day of one's birth, if anything the mother should be celebrated (but not his, not his mother). After all, they went through hours of pain to deliver the person being celebrated. Of course, now that he and Natalie barely had anything, birthdays and Christmases were a way to get the luxury items they could no longer afford to buy.

He did celebrate them, he just didn't quite understand _why_.

Everyone had decided to take the few days off so they could all rest. V-One had given instructions to get to Alaska by the end of the week, which gave Amy and Dan five – four, now – days to relax. They spent the first day sleeping in, everyone else in the comm. center followed suit with that. They were all probably still asleep at noon the next day.

All except Ian.

He blamed Elizabeth and her damned Happy Birthday text.

With these thoughts in hand, you can understand that he was rather surprised when Amy walked into the library.

Well, maybe not _that_ surprised.

"Hey, I thought you'd be asleep." She walked over next to him, offering a kind but tired smile.

He shrugged. "I'd think the same of you."

She grabbed his forearm and began to drag him out of the library. "Some things are more important."

He drew his eyebrows together. She was taking him down the hall, towards the west side of the mansion. The only important parts of the west side, which Ian could think off, were the kitchen and dining room. He was led down a flight of stairs and then Amy took a sudden, sharp left.

All of the Cahills working in the comm. center (plus Dan) were around a table, each person slightly sagging in weariness. Dan was the only one not smiling, but he seemed to be sleep walking anyway.

"Happy birthday!" Amy and Sinead said together. Sinead motioned for Hamilton to step aside, revealing a rather sad looking cake.

Ian shook his head. "We should be resting, working, not—"

"Think of it as a break," Sinead interjected, "I don't know about you, but I definitely need some chocolate cake—"

Chocolate. Ian didn't particularly like chocolate.

"—especially since _Amy_ and _Jonah_ made it."

It wouldn't be too bad then, they both at least knew how to cook properly – unlike most of the people in the house.

Everyone's mood seemed to go up, though Ian was sure it wasn't because of _him_. Most everyone seemed to hate him, not that he could blame them. He had done some pretty nasty things. Hamilton and Jonah and Dan were joking around, occasionally howling in laughter. Sinead and Amy were talking about something, trying to get Ian in on the conversation just to be nice, but he didn't really pay attention to what it was. He couldn't help but smile at the audacity of the people around him, laughing and smiling in a time of dread.

It was refreshing.

Especially since the Tolliver boy wasn't there.

"Well," Amy said once everyone seemed to be mostly done with their cake, "moving on to presents, then?"

"No," Ian said, surprising even himself.

"It's your birthday and you're getting presents," Sinead snapped as Amy moved back into another room, "it's your choice what to do with them."

Amy came back holding only three boxes, certainly not what Ian was used to.

Then again, were any one of them used to what was going on?

She set them down on the table as Sinead pushed Ian towards them. She then shoved one of them into his crossed arms.

He sighed and grudgingly opened it.

"Hey, hey!" She cried. "Who's it from?"

He rolled his eyes and looked at the tag. "You and Jonah?"

Jonah's smile widened as Ian opened the box. Clothes, the distinctive white box all but read. A new suit? The ones he had now were certainly getting a little ratty.

It was a new suit.

"It's Armani," Jonah tempted, "custom made and everything, bro."

Ian chuckled before placing the top back onto the box and setting it down. Jonah probably bought it and Sinead wrapped it, or perhaps they split the price.

"Next one!" Dan said, a little _too_ enthusiastic for Ian's comfort.

He hesitantly picked up a package similar in size to the last, caught Sinead's eye, and said, "Hamilton and Dan. Lord, save me."

"Hey!" Hamilton chuckled.

Jeans.

"Arizona Jean Co.," Dan laughed, "welcome to the high life!"

He tossed the box back onto the table without a second thought.

The last one wasn't a box; it was just wrapping paper around a piece of what seemed like cloth. "Amy," Ian read.

Before he even opened it, Amy started explaining. "Sinead told me sometimes you wear this horribly ratty – almost _decomposed_ – scarf. It seemed so out of character for you, so I thought I'd renew it. I spent all last night patching it up." She bit her lip in concern. "I really hope I didn't ruin any sentimental value to it, I only noticed that it was home made until after I was done."

The scarf given to him by someone he didn't even remember, something he'd treasured since he was young. His mother had tried to throw it away after he had gotten it, that much he remembered, but he fished it out and hid it from her. Over the years he'd forgotten why it was so important to him, a scarf resembling one from a television series Ian didn't remember. It had gotten so old and worn out, fraying so horribly that nearly the whole thing was falling apart. Amy had fixed it, reuniting the frayed threads, used completely new materials, and probably even washing it. It was colorful again, not dull that it had become.

It was exactly as he remember from when he was young.

He wrapped it loosely around his neck and smiled at Amy. "It's perfect."

His stomach seemed to flutter as Amy gave him a warm smile back.

* * *

><p>Clean up went quickly, as there wasn't much to clean. Everyone mumbled him a last Happy Birthday, even Dan, before heading back to their rooms to sleep some more. Amy stayed behind with Sinead and Ian, just making some small chat.<p>

Sinead yawned. "Well, I gotta go or I'll collapse in a few seconds."

"Yeah, Sinead," Amy giggled, "not using proper English? You really need a nap."

Amy situated herself to sit on top the table after Sinead left. "So, did you like your birthday party?"

Ian shrugged. "It was nice, given the circumstances."

Amy nodded.

They were alone in the room, now would be the perfect time to say it. Ian's conscience nagged at him, but was it really worth it?

"Well, I've gotta go."

"No, um, I want to talk to you about something."

Well shit.

Amy walked back over to him, a curious expression playing her features. "What's up?"

He bit his lip. "You have to—you have to promise that you'll hear me out, you won't judge or run away until I'm done."

Now she was concerned, but she nodded all the same.

It took a full minute to finally say something, but it turned out in stutters so he calmed himself for another minute before going on. "You want to know… why exactly I seem to hate Evan so much?"

Her eyebrows drew in closer. "Yeah."

He took a deep breath and bit his lip before speaking again. "I, uh, I guess you could say that I'm… _jealous_ of him."

Amy snorted. "Jealous? You?" Her face returned to being concerned when she noticed that Ian was being serious. "Why?"

He just looked at her, took her in. He'd done so many horrible things to her, yet she was willing to stand and talk to him right now as if they were old friends. He'd be lying if he said he thought she was beautiful - she was almost bland, forgettable in a way. But she was beautiful in personality. That's why he liked her so, _because_ she was willing to talk to him after all the horrible things he'd done to her.

"I'm jealous of him because he gets to be with you."

He let that hang in the air for a few moments before opening his mouth to continue.

"Ian," her voice seemed waver, "if – if you're about to say what I think you are? Don't."

An audible crack filled Ian's ears, his stomach plummeted, and his eyes widened.

"I know I said I would let you finish," she whispered. "but I'm in a relationship right now. I can't… have this sort of thing on my mind. Especially with what's going on with the Vespers." She regarded him sadly, "I'm sorry."

"I was just," his voice cracked, "I was just going to say that I was jealous of him because he gets to be with you because…" He struggled for an excuse, "because he seems so happy."

_And I'm not._

He walked away, letting that thought simmer in his mind. In a way he wasn't lying, but it still wasn't what he set out to say.

For the second time in a month he cried.

**If you want a little more info on Ian's super awesome scarf, you can check out the last chapter to my other fanfic_ A Most Unusual Friendship_.**


End file.
